What are a Muslim's duties toward ageing parents and relatives?

The short answer

The Quran commands kind treatment of parents, especially in old age, and encourages humility and mercy toward them. The form of care depends on ability and need; involve relatives and qualified services when needed while preserving dignity and safety.

Evidence 1 2 3

Explanation

Allah commands kindness to parents and specifically says not to speak harshly to them if they reach old age in your care; instead, speak honourably and pray for mercy for them 1. The Quran repeats the duty of good treatment and recognizes the hardship a mother bears 2. These teachings call for gratitude, patience and practical attention, not merely polite words.

Care can include listening, arranging appointments, helping with finances or daily tasks, and making sure an older person is not isolated or mistreated. One adult child may not be able to provide round-the-clock care alone. Share responsibilities among relatives where possible, consider safe professional support, and include the older person's preferences whenever they can express them. Do not neglect your own health or dependants while seeking a sustainable plan.

If dementia, disability, abuse or complex medical needs are present, consult clinicians and relevant safeguarding services. Scholars can advise on specific financial duties and family obligations because capacity and local circumstances matter. The Quran sets the duty of kindness; it does not prescribe one care arrangement for every family.

The evidence

  1. 1
    Quran Al-Israa · 17:23–24

    Treat parents with excellence, speak nobly to them and pray for mercy, especially in old age.

    ۞وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعۡبُدُوٓاْ إِلَّآ إِيَّاهُ وَبِٱلۡوَٰلِدَيۡنِ إِحۡسَٰنًاۚ إِمَّا يَبۡلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ ٱلۡكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَآ أَوۡ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفࣲّ وَلَا تَنۡهَرۡهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوۡلࣰ ا كَرِيمࣰ ا ۝٢٣ وَٱخۡفِضۡ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحۡمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ٱرۡحَمۡهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرࣰ ا ۝٢٤

    23 And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word 24 And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small

  2. 2
    Quran Al-Ahqaf · 46:15

    Good treatment of parents is commanded, with recognition of a mother's hardship.

    وَوَصَّيۡنَا ٱلۡإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيۡهِ إِحۡسَٰنًاۖ حَمَلَتۡهُ أُمُّهُۥ كُرۡهࣰ ا وَوَضَعَتۡهُ كُرۡهࣰ اۖ وَحَمۡلُهُۥ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ ثَلَٰثُونَ شَهۡرًاۚ حَتَّىٰٓ إِذَا بَلَغَ أَشُدَّهُۥ وَبَلَغَ أَرۡبَعِينَ سَنَةࣰ قَالَ رَبِّ أَوۡزِعۡنِيٓ أَنۡ أَشۡكُرَ نِعۡمَتَكَ ٱلَّتِيٓ أَنۡعَمۡتَ عَلَيَّ وَعَلَىٰ وَٰلِدَيَّ وَأَنۡ أَعۡمَلَ صَٰلِحࣰ ا تَرۡضَىٰهُ وَأَصۡلِحۡ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِيٓۖ إِنِّي تُبۡتُ إِلَيۡكَ وَإِنِّي مِنَ ٱلۡمُسۡلِمِينَ ۝١٥

    And We have enjoined upon man, to his parents, good treatment. His mother carried him with hardship and gave birth to him with hardship, and his gestation and weaning [period] is thirty months. [He grows] until, when he reaches maturity and reaches [the age of] forty years, he says, "My Lord, enable me to be grateful for Your favor which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents and to work righteousness of which You will approve and make righteous for me my offspring. Indeed, I have repented to You, and indeed, I am of the Muslims

  3. 3
    Hadith Sahih al-Bukhari 7138
    Sahih Bukhari

    A person is responsible as a guardian for those in their care.

    Narrated `Abdullah bin `Umar:Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "Surely! Everyone of you is a guardian and is responsible for his charges: The Imam (ruler) of the people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects; a man is the guardian of his family (household) and is responsible for his subjects; a woman is the guardian of her husband's home and of his children and is responsible for them; and the slave of a man is a guardian of his master's property and is responsible for it. Surely, everyone of you is a guardian and responsible for his charges

    العربية

    حَدَّثَنَا إِسْمَاعِيلُ، حَدَّثَنِي مَالِكٌ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ دِينَارٍ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عُمَرَ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏ "‏ أَلاَ كُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ، وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ، فَالإِمَامُ الَّذِي عَلَى النَّاسِ رَاعٍ وَهْوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ، وَالرَّجُلُ رَاعٍ عَلَى أَهْلِ بَيْتِهِ وَهْوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ، وَالْمَرْأَةُ رَاعِيَةٌ عَلَى أَهْلِ بَيْتِ زَوْجِهَا وَوَلَدِهِ وَهِيَ مَسْئُولَةٌ عَنْهُمْ، وَعَبْدُ الرَّجُلِ رَاعٍ عَلَى مَالِ سَيِّدِهِ وَهْوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُ، أَلاَ فَكُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ ‏"‏‏.‏

This answer was compiled with the help of AI, using only the verified texts shown here. Every reference links to its source. If you find a mistake, please report it. Updated 2026-09-25

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